Tag Archives: Death

Listen to Yourself

A dying old man said to his doctor while on the sick bed ” Doctor, don’t worry. I know I am going to die. I didn’t want to come here but they brought me here.

Please don’t worry about me, look at my hair, they are gone. I am so old but you are so young. I have learnt a lot from life, if you don’t mind I will tell you some of them before I die.

When I was 4 years, I use to think the world is about me. When I turned 14, I wanted to rule the world. I thought I would be the greatest man that ever lived. When I was 21, I wanted to be the richest man, when I was 25, I wanted to find love, when I was 40, I wanted to be helpful to everyone. Now that I am here, I want to die. You see, I wanted so many things at so many times. Most importantly, I wanted to be happy. I thought the best way to be happy is to listen to others.

When I wanted to enter the University, I wanted to study Zoology but everyone said I should study Engineering that I will be a great Engineer. So I listened to them. I had no one to pay my fees, I had to work and also pay my fees. In my third year, I couldn’t cope with my studies, I had to drop. When I dropped, the same people told me “you should have studied Zoology”!

When I turned 28, everyone said I should marry. That I needed a wife. So I listened to them, I got married. 6 years into the marriage, I caught my wife sleeping with my neighbour. I asked her why and she slapped me. I was angry and didn’t say anything. The next day I returned from work, she had run away with my children, now I am dying a lonely man.

At 40, I got a huge contract. My name was in the news. The next day, all my friends and families were at my house, everyone had a serious problem. Within one week, I spent all the money on them with the promise that they will pay back. I could not complete the contract because they refused to return the money as promised. So I was sent to jail for 6 years. I stayed in jail and I came out. When I came out, they were nowhere.

There was one mistake I made through all this time. Now it is clear to me. Let me tell you about it. I refused to listen to myself. I ignored my own self and listen to others. Now that I am here the only person that is with me is myself.

You see, it is very good to listen to others. It is very wise to seek advice from others. But it is very dangerous to ignore your own self. It is very dangerous to refuse to pay attention to your heart.

When you get home this night, sit down, take a glass of water. Close your eyes if you want or open it if you want, then talk to yourself, reason with yourself. You can walk down the road alone and as you walk, begin to talk to yourself.

The only person that can overrule yourself is God, after God, listen to yourself next. I know it may not make sense to you now but always remember I told you LEARN TO LISTEN TO YOURSELF.

 

The Cross-Over

Mother opened the door of my room slowly and walked in gently with her hands folded loosely on her breasts. Her eyes were reddened and she was sniffing. I knew she had been crying all day and into the night. As she came closer to my bed, I closed my eyes and listened to my breath. – they were heavy and short paced.
“Please God, heal my baby boy…”
I could hear mother say as she knelt beside my bed.
It was on new year’s eve and mother was home alone with me. Father had abandoned mother when he got tired of taking care of a sickle celled son three years after I was born. Mother said he ran off to marry another woman in another city. And in my twelve years of human existence, I had only seen my father in a picture frame. He had looked happy in that suit he was wearing as he held mother close in that white wedding gown. In my twelve years of human existence, I had only seen mother smile so brightly in that picture frame.
Mother continued to cry, begging God to heal me as she held my shivering hand. I wanted to tell her to stop crying, that everything will be OK, but I barely had enough strength to keep my eye lids open, let alone formulate words with my tongue. I managed to open my eyes and I saw the digital clock hanging up on the wall – 11:58. And it was two minutes to the new year. I closed my eyes again.
As mother continued to pray through her crying voice, I heard the cheering sound of screaming people around the neighbourhood. Happy New year!!! They screamed and shouted, as I tried again to open my eyes… LIGHT, WHITE LIGHT… and I saw a man in an immaculate white robe with a most reassuring smile. He beckoned on me and I moved towards him, for I was standing now. As I turned back to see what was behind me, I saw mother still crying and begging God to heal her baby boy and there he was, lying lifeless on the bed.

(C) Peter Akhere